November 26, 1987
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon and Jesse “The Pilgrim” Ventura
- The Fink welcomes us to the show (that man is an underappreciated part of WWE history) and introduces us to the announce team. Jesse is dressed like a circa 1970’s pimp, with a snakeskin outfit and pilgrim hat. Gorilla dresses in a terrible tux like always. They proceed to explain the rules.
- Craig Degeorge is with The Honky Tonk Man’s team, they proceed to threaten both Miss Elizabeth and the babyfaces.
- Mean Gene is with the Macho Man’s team and they had apparently just finished all of Ohio’s cocaine moments before.
Survivor Series 5 on 5: Captain- Intercontinental Champion the Honky Tonk Man with Jimmy Hart, “Handsome” Harley Race with Bobby Heenan, “Outlaw” Ron Bass, Hercules and “Dangerous” Danny Davis vs
Captain- “Macho Man” Randy Savage with Miss Elizabeth, Ricky “The Dragon” Steamboat, Brutus “The Barber” Beefcake, Jake “The Snake” Roberts and “Hacksaw” Jim Duggan
Notes and Opinion: This was a great way to start the show and give the crowd an idea of what this match was supposed to be. Everyone on the face side hated Honky and wanted to kick his ass so the crowd was hyped for this from jump street. The entire babyface side was OVER man, with Macho getting the biggest pop of the group. The heels picked Davis to be on their team so they deserved to get beat. This match did it’s damn job man. The only slightly negative thing I have to say is poor Harley was starting to look like it was time to hang them up, oh and I never liked Danny Davis. Other than that I’m not sure you could have started off this show in a better way.
Survivors: Macho, Jake and Steamboat
- Craig is with Andre’s team who think that Hogan’s team sucks. Also Andre works in a Princess Bride line when he claims to be there for Hogan’s “SOOOUUULLL”, that is too awesome to describe.
Match 2: Survivor Series 5 on 5
Captain- WWE Women’s Champion Sherri Martel, WWE Women’s Tag Team Champions The Glamour Girls ( Judy Martin and Leilani Kai) with Jimmy Hart, Dawn Marie (Not that one) and Donna Christanello
Captain- Fabulous Moolah, Velvet McIntyre, Rockin’ Robin and the Jumping Bomb Angels ( Itsuki and Noriyo)
Notes and Opinion: If Sherri or the Angels weren’t in this match it was terrible. Moolah was past her prime by roughly twenty years and the remainder of the women worked down to her standards. This was really some awful women’s wrestling, the moves sucked, the gear was shit and everyone moved at half speed. Sherri was a damn star, she looked great, her gear was not awful and she wrestled like a legitimate athlete. The Angels would still be awesome if they debuted now, they were so far above this mess it wasn’t even funny. Big props to those three ladies for not being awful. Everyone else owes me twenty minutes of my life I’ll never get back. I would rather watch a 60 minute Iron man match between Kelly Kelly and Carmella than to ever watch this again. I award them no points, and may God have mercy on their souls.
Survivors: The Jumping Bomb Angels
- We have an interview with the Hart Foundation’s team, eh, even Brain couldn’t save this train wreck.
- Strike Force proves their worth by leading their team to an even WORSE interview, I like both guys but Strike Force sucked.
Match 3: Survivor Series 5 on 5 team
Captains- The Hart Foundation (Bret Hart and Jim Neidhart) with Jimmy Hart, Demolition (Ax and Smash) with Mr. Fuji, The Dream Team (Greg Valentine and Dino Bravo) with Johnny V, The Islanders (Haku and Tama) with Bobby Heenan and The Bolsheviks (Nikolai Volkoff and Boris Zukhoff) with Slick
Captains- WWE Tag Team Champions Strike Force (Rick Martel and Tito Santana), The British Bulldogs (Dynamite Kid and Davey Boy Smith) with Matilda, The Young Stallions (Paul Roma and Jim Powers), The Rougeau Brothers (Jacques and Raymond) and The Killer Bees (Jim Brunzell and B. Brian Blair
Notes and Opinions: Other than Dream Team 2.0, I could not have picked two teams who I would have liked to see not survive more. The Stallions NEVER IMPROVED and the Bees were some cheating ass dudes even when I was a kid. As an unabashed Demolition Fanboy anything less than them murdering the entire lame ass babyface side (except for the Bulldogs, even though they were on a downward spiral themselves) was inexcusable. Also how was Haku not pushed more than he was? These questions keep me up at night (Also they had him sell other people’s headbutts…I’m pretty sure that isn’t supposed to happen). The match itself was OK, way better than the ladies but behind the opener. Too many people surrounding the ring made it unbelievable at best, and ridiculous that anyone could get pinned at worst.
Survivors: Stallions and the Bees
- Jesse and Gorilla discuss how they imagine Ted Dibiase spends Thanksgiving.
- Dibiase then cuts a sweet ass heel promo from the back of a limo before they cut to all the evil shit he did to people, yes RVD kissing his feet made the video.
- Gorilla and Jesse waste more time by talking about shit we’ve already seen.
- Craig is with Jimmy and Honky …who challenges Hogan, good luck with that.
- Gene is backstage with Team Hogan and I would like to apologize to Team Savage about that cocaine joke earlier, THESE MOTHERFUCKERS were the one’s that did it…Savage’s team must have been on something else.
Match 4: Survivor Series 5 on 5
Captain- Andre the Giant, “Ravishing” Rick Rude and King Kong Bundy with Bobby “The Brain” Heenan, “The Natural” Butch Reed and One Man Gang with Slick
Captain- WWE Champion Hulk Hogan, Ken Patera, Don “The Rock” Muraco, “Mr. Wonderful” Paul Orndorff and Bam Bam Bigelow with “Sir” Oliver Humperdink
Notes and Opinion: The 1980’s were a weird time man, the pop Hogan got was AMAZING. Then he proceeded to run from the Giant like a coward and then attack him from behind after the match with a weapon…what a dick. The match itself was fun and made Bam Bam look great, sadly nothing big ever came out of that (unless you count making the WrestleMania video game). Don Muraco also deserves a mention for looking RIPPED TO SHREDS in a way that I’m sure had nothing to do with steroids. Speaking of looks, Andre looked way better here than he did at Mania and moved a lot quicker. This would set up the huge rematch between he and Hogan on The Main event in February in a big way. Not a bad way to end an experiment like this show.
Survivor: Andre the Giant
- Hogan celebrates attacking a man from behind with a 15 minute posing exhibition while Jesse calls him a scumbag and Gorilla sucks Hogan’s dick. Jesse is in all his glory with this.
- Gene is with Andre and the Brain who tells Hogan to put up or shut up.
Overall Thoughts: No matter why they had this show it is a historical event for wrestling. This was also the first time as a kid that I ever saw Hogan lose a match, in retrospect wow, that guy was a selfish jerk and he deserved it. However, that being said, that man put asses every 20 inches for a long, long time and this was just another example of how putting him on a show made the crowd go into a frenzy. As an historical event I recommend seeing it but don’t expect greatness.
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