Once in a lifetime. I mean. The first time IS technically once in a lifetime right?
Commentary: Michael Cole and Jerry Lawler
- Lillian Garcia sings America the Beautiful. She always had a good voice.
- WrestleMania videos are always well done.
World Heavyweight Championship: Daniel Bryan (w/ AJ Lee) v Sheamus
I miss the old Sheamus music. Daniel Bryan was OVER and it didn’t matter. Obviously no point. 0-1
Winner: Sheamus got the quick win after a Brogue Kick.
- Team Johnny are ready. Johnny is wearing the old Rick Pitino ACC tournament suit.
Kane v Randy Orton
Ah yes. Old two mask Kane. I’m sure this is what got him that Hall of Fame nod. I guess since the crowd was super excited after that first match they needed to make sure no one had a good time in match two. Boring as all hell. 0-2
Winner: Kane via the Chokeslam from the second rope.
- Santino and Mick Foley are with a Deadliest Catch guy. Didn’t watch so I’m unfamiliar. I’m not sure who’s fake accent is worse. Not. Good. Thank God Ron Simmons arrives to Damn the entire deal.
- Some National Guard are in the crowd.
- We recap the Cody/Show deal. This was a stretch to say the least. Cole saying Big Show has never been part of a pinfall kinda negates the previous year but I guess we aren’t supposed to remember that.
Intercontinental Championship: (C) Cody Rhodes v Big Show
This was not what I would call good but at least it was short. The entire setup and story was dumb so I just wasn’t feeling it. Blah. 0-3
Winner: Big Show via the WMD.
- We get a Diva hype video. I’m sure they would have preferred matches that meant something but I’m sure this is fine.
Kelly Kelly/Maria Menounos v Beth Phoenix /Eve
Beth was great and Eve was seriously underrated but they were not miracle workers. Kelly was never a great in ring worker and no matter how big a fan Maria was she had no business in there. This show is starting out really poorly thus far. 0-4
Winners: The woman who got injured while TRAINING FOR DANCING WITH THE STARS pinned the Divas Champion and future Hall of Famer with a roll-up.
- Matt Striker was with HBK. The end of an Era is mentioned 47 times
- Another attendance record is set. 78,363.
- JR and his goatee join us for commentary.
- Holy shit. They kept the Metallica entrance for the cage. Maybe Peacock ain’t that bad.
Hell In A Cell/Guest Referee Shawn Michaels: Undertaker v HHH
I liked mohawk Taker. Somehow being a year older they managed to pull off an even better match than the previous Mania. This was the real streak of the Undertaker. From WrestleManias 23-29 he pulled out banger after banger and even as good as this one was it was probably only the third best of the bunch. As the kids say this is fire. I guess they say that. Who knows? I’m old as hell y’all. One way or another this was an easy point no matter how you slice it. Finally a good match. 1-5
Winner: The Undertaker via the Tombstone. 20-0
- We see all three men show respect as they make it up the ramp.
- Hall of Fame recap.
- The Hall of Fame folks arrive again. FINK!
Four Horsemen ofArn, JJ, Barry, Tully and Ric
Edge with the short hair. Edge tearing up means way more now.
- Josh Matthews is about to interview Flo Rida but is interupted by Heath Slater. Poor Heath gets beaten up.
- Brie Bella introduces Team Johnny.
- Nikki Bella introduces Team Teddy. They won that battle
Team Johnny (The Miz/Mark Henry/ Drew McIntyre/Jack Swagger/Dolph Ziggler/David Otunga w/John Lauranitis and Vickie Guerrero) v Team Teddy (Kofi Kingston/The Great Khali/R-Truth/Zack Ryder Booker T/Santino w/Teddy Long, Hornswoggle, Aksana and Eve)
Another match that would have been better served to be on the Kickoff Show. This just exists so a bunch of people who otherwise wouldn’t could get paydays. Just not anything I am excited about at all. Especially with the stakes being what they were. Just no. 1-6
Winner: Team Johnny after a SCF to Ryder following an Eve distraction.
- She then kicks Zack in the balls after the match because that had to happen. Johnny was now GM of both shows.
- Torrie Wilson and A-Rod are in the crowd.
- We recap WrestleMania week.
- Team Johnny celebrates and run into Punk. Johnny informs Punk if he’s disqualified then he loses the belt. I mean. Why make the match good with extra intensity right?
- We recap Jericho talking smack about Punk’s family etc.
WWE Championship/If Punk is DQ’d he loses the title: (C) CM Punk v Chris Jericho
I really wish they didn’t have matching tights. This started out a little bit slow but once they got going it turned into a really good one. Punk was still on the roll of a lifetime and Chris proved he could still turn it on when necessary. I’m just glad that these two were around to add another good one to this show because it was looking very bleak. 2-7
Winner: CM Punk via the Anaconda Vice.
- WrestleMania 29 is at MetLife next year.
- The pilots from the opening fly over are here.
- Broadus Clay is also here. I miss the Funkadactyls for obvious reasons. A bunch of Mommas show up to waste time with a dance party.
- We see the Rock/Cena build. This was huge at the time for real.
- Diddy is here. He introduces MGK for Cena’s entrance. Cena gets KILLED by Miami. Duh.
- Flo Rida is out to perform before the Rock arrives. Never forget Flo Rida lost a rap battle to Bo Dallas.
- Spoiler. Rock was over.
John Cena v The Rock
This was a hell of a main event and even better when you consider Rock was blown up halfway through his entrance. Two master performers did exactly what everyone thought they would and took the audience and myself years later on a fun ride. Cena getting too cocky and it costing him was amazing. Great way to end a show and even better way to set up the next year. 3-8
Winner: Rock after a Rock Bottom.
- That pop. Damn. Cena sitting on the ramp in shock is an amazing visual. Just good stuff.
Final Tally? 3-8 For the second year in a row. But once again the matches that were good were really damn good. Check out those three and skip the rest. Better than the previous year for sure no matter what the numbers said.
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